10/10/2015 – Shirts Butchered by The Ice Man

Teams lined up once again at the Ames Levett Stadium in Canterbury in front of a crowd of one (the receptionist sweeping the path).

Shirts: Simon (The Professor) Ludden, Roger (The Avenger) Betts, John (The General) Ballantyne, Trevor (The Maestro) Pearce and Barry (The Banker) Wilcox.

Oranges: Julian (The Calculator) Wiseman, Peter (The Wolf) Morris, Jonathan (The Ice Man) Butcher, Tony (The Lawman) Newington and Tony (The Whippet) McMullen.

Referee: James (L’Assassino) Lennox.

Some players were clearly feeling the after effects of the mid-week European campaign and the inevitable jet-lag (Sandwich away). The Bay City Strollers deliberate ploy of releasing thousands of hungry mosquitoes prior to their fortunate victory over the Canterbury Heroes had taken its toll, with many of the Canterbury players having self-administered malaria tablets which resulted in uncharacteristic fatigue during their training session.

There was controversy at the half-time whistle when there was a disagreement about the actual score. Referee Mr Lennox asserted his authority by revealing the contents of his referee’s notebook – yep – it definitely said 2 – 1 to the Oranges, who thought it was 3 (Folkestone – déjà vu?). Morris walked away muttering under his breath in a Black Country accent something about, “’This ain’t gettin the babby a frock and pinny”, “a smack in the fizzog” and “the ref being ‘alf soaked.” They haven’t heard the like in Kent since my granny was down here with the Land Army in WW1 (TP)

However, as they say – ‘form is temporary, class is permanent’ – suffice to say, Butcher and Pearce managed no less than 7 of the nights 9 goals; The Ice Man slotting in 5 for the Oranges and The Maestro chalking up 2 for the Shirts in reply. Each player’s final goals of the session can be seen on the footage. McMullen and Betts scored the other 2 goals, 1 for each side, as the Oranges ran out 6 – 3 winners.

At the end of the session Barry (The Banker) Wilcox made a hurried exit in order to practice his speech for the visit of Radio Kent at the Ames Levett early Tuesday morning. The BBC has allocated a 3 hour slot in anticipation.


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